Let Go of Guilt
Are you holding onto items you don't need or like because you feel guilty?
Have a house full of mid-century modern furniture, but keeping your grandmother's antique Victorian dresser because your family thinks it's a crime to let go of heirlooms? Holding on to that seashell key-holder your aunt gave you for your birthday that is too ghastly to use anywhere?
You’re not alone! Feeling guilt is a common reason for keeping things. Maybe you received a gift that wasn’t your style, don’t have a use for a particular item, or spent a lot of money on something you don’t need.
Instead of focusing on guilt, try to reframe your mindset. Consider the positive impact that letting go can have on your life. Donating or selling items can provide a new home for your possessions where they'll be appreciated and used. It also creates space and calm in your home, which can have a positive impact on your mental well-being.
Decluttering can be challenging, especially when there are emotions and memories attached to the items. However, you're not obligated to keep anything that doesn't make you happy or serve a purpose in your life.
A friend was telling me that she had recently been inspired to clear clutter and had attacked her closet with zeal, setting aside all the clothes she didn’t wear. It was going great until she came upon a pair of jeans she’d had since her mid-twenties, and then she got stuck. They’d been an expensive splurge at the time, but she only wore them once or twice, and she felt bad about “wasting” the money. We both laughed about this when we started talking it through. She was no longer in her twenties, the jeans were no longer in style, and her body wasn’t the same after two kids anyway. What good was it doing to feel guilty? Happily, she decided to donate the jeans.
In Making Space, Clutter Free: The Last Book on Decluttering You'll Ever Need, professional organizer Tracy McCubbin encourages forgiving yourself for money spent on something you no longer need or use. She says, "It's okay that I made a mistake in buying this item. My home is not an orphanage for unused objects. I can let this go to someone who will actually use it or even to the garbage, and I am still a good person."
If you’re still struggling with letting go, one helpful strategy is to take a photo of the item before donating or selling it. This way, you can still hold onto the memory without the physical item taking up space in your home.
It's important to recognize that decluttering is a process and it's okay to take it at your own pace. Don't be too hard on yourself if you can't let go of everything at once. Every small step counts towards a more clutter-free and peaceful home.